As some of you may know, Sean has been having troubles with his back for several years due to being Airborne and having a couple of bad jumps. It was so bad last year that he got sent home from the deployment early and since then he's been making almost monthly trips to Germany to try and fix the problem.
He went again this past week to have a procedure done (it's called an IDET) that would essentially melt part of his discs/nerves to help with pain. His main surgeon, whom we both like, said he'd like to try this before they explore actual surgery. Well, when Sean went in yesterday to have the IDET performed, they tried and then told him his discs were so torn and damaged that it was impossible. A different surgeon was performing this procedure and told Sean, "I think you just need to be medboarded). Even though that is not what was discussed for his treatment or what his main surgeon or the doctors here in Vicenza have thought would be the best course of action. To say I'm angry is putting it mildly. You don't jerk someone around for several years, finally saying you are going to do what it takes to fix a chronic problem and then just say they need to be released from the Army.
Sean is going to talk to his doctors here and see what they have to say, but I think yesterday was just the last straw for him. He'd talked about re-classing and staying in until it was time for him to retire, but I think now he's strongly considering going ahead with the medboard process and going back to college. I can't say that I blame him. He changes his mind a lot about this subject, so although he's talking about getting out, it's not 100% that's what he's going to do.
I'd also like to state for the record that I'm in favor of whatever my husband should decide, but I'm also kind of freaking out. I love the fact we'd probably go live in the nearest big city to our hometown and I'd be in the same state as most of my family and friends. I'm excited that there would be no more deployments and we'd finally get to buy a house. However, finding a decent job in the economy right now scares me and as ridiculous as this sounds, I'm worried about leaving the community of Mil-Spouses. I don't really define myself as an Army wife and honestly I don't blog that much about being a military spouse. I feel tied into the community itand if I'm not longer a military spouse, will I feel like an outsider? Will anyone want to read my blog anymore? I can't be New Girl on Post anymore and that feels weird to me.
I know this probably sounds ridiculous to some people, but the thought of taking such a big step and changing what I've been used to for the past 4 years is very scary to me.