Wednesday, February 8, 2012

If You Can't Say Something Nice...

So this morning I'm surfing through the blogosphere and come across a milspouse blog I normally read. In the post, the blogger expressed some feelings of disappointment about her current situation, and reading through the comments I was shocked.  Fellow military bloggers were being downright rude about the fact she voiced her opinions and disappointment over her own personal situation.

First of all, the military and the various situations that we encounter in it as spouses, are not a pissing contest. I don't care what someone says, you do not start complaining about your own situation and how the person who's blog you are commenting on, has it so much better than you. That's rude and not necessary at all.

Secondly, I realize there are times when we don't agree with what a blogger has to say. I know there are at least a few times a week where I read a blog and think how ridiculous the blog post is or how aggravated it makes me. Instead of telling the blogger how stupid I think their opinion is or how mad their post makes me feel, I do one of two things.

1. I go and complain to one of my good friends about how ridiculous the blog was
2. I let it go and don't comment on the blog

If you don't agree with someone, you don't have to be rude and tell them to suck it up or how they shouldn't be complaining. It's their blog, they have every right to complain or say whatever they want. If you don't like it, then don't read it. It's that simple. Please don't take this as to mean I think you should never leave a comment disagreeing with someone. However, when it has to do with someone's personal situation and they are venting, I don't think rude or unhelpful comments are necessary.

What especially bothers me is that I think military spouses should be a little more supportive and understanding when a fellow mil-spouse is having a bad day or is bothered by something. Remember that when your time comes to be upset, you would want someone to be nice and supportive to you. Not people telling you to suck it up.

11 comments:

Megan said...

Agreed!

loqi said...

What Megan said.

Except one thing. You forgot option #3 -- unsubscribe! No one forces you to read anyone else's blog!

Emily of Boston said...

Ditto.

The Pink Growl said...

I'm not a military spouse, but I agree with you 100% I am a police officer's wife-to-be and it's a similar situation with some of the frustrations you can experience. I think it's super important for wives/gfs in these situations to stick together and empower each other to express our frustrations when they come. It's healthy!
Plus, your blog is YOUR place to vent or talk about whatever YOU want.

Expat Girl said...

Amen!

Seneca said...

“Be kinder than necessary,
for everyone you meet is fighting
some kind of battle.” I wish more people felt this way.

JG said...

Agreed. Saw the same post and thought the same thing. In addition, I read another blog yesterday that rubbed me the wrong way. I really could have torn the writer to pieces (the post made it pretty easy to do so) but I didn't. I just left because it's her space and she has the right to write whatever she wants and I DON'T have the write to be negative on HER space. That's my opinion, anyway.

Unknown said...

I saw that post too and thought the same thing...Just because you might have went through that or worse, doesn't make the "suck" factor any less for her---

Sarah said...

Couldn't agree with you more. I don't understand why people feel like we're in a "whose life sucks worse" competition. It's NOT a competition. It's life, and military life brings different challenges to every single one of us.

Christine said...

amen sister. i always wonder why people just don't read what they don't like? no one is forcing you to read a certain blog.

and seriously, aren't we ladies (milspouses especially!) supposed to stick together!?!?

Anonymous said...

I have actually had to deal with this in real life from other MilSpouses it's sucks. Yeah it is in your right to go tell someone else or speak about it with them but when you actually recruit women to hate another fellow spouse, that is low!