Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Living the Dual Military Life

I met today's blogger, Mrs. H, through blogland. I've enjoyed getting to know her the last year or so and one of these days I really hope to meet her in person. You can check her out at Married to the Job, she's got a new look to her blog and it's super cute!

I’m so glad that I’m getting to guest blog for one of my favorite bloggers. For a while I didn’t know what to write about. Then my husband asked me how many dual military blogs do I follow, and I realized that I’m the only one where both spouses are active duty. (Well, that I have found. I’m sure there are others out there.)

My husband and I get asked all the time what it is like to both serve in the same job. We are both Air Traffic Controllers, we are just in different facilities. I bet you all are wondering what that means.

Well let me explain; I work in the tower. Meaning my air space is 5 miles and I mostly clear aircraft to take off and land. My husband works in RAPCON (aka radar) and is in charge of 60 miles of airspace, and about 20+ aircraft at any given time. He tells them what altitudes to maintain, and makes sure they don’t hit each other. He easily has it harder.

When I was still a civilian, I was with a military man, and I can say that hands down being the military member is easier. It is hard work being the cheerleader, and supporter to things that sometimes make no sense to you whatsoever. I know… I’ve been there.

I guess that’s one of the best things about being married dual military, especially having the same job that we do. When I come home and have a full blown break down because I had a bad day on the sims, he understands. He isn’t just soothing me because that’s his husband duty, he is doing it because he fully gets it. We he comes home and says he had a set bust on sims, I know what that means and just how bad that is, without him going into a full explanation. When I come home and say “it was one of those days when I wish I was any other job but ours,” he knows that no other words need to be spoken.

We understand each other on a level not many people can. I understand the stress, and the pressure to never make a mistake. I also understand the sick drive it takes to do this job day after day, and in a twisted way, wanting to be good at it, and end up liking it. I also am fully aware of the mental toll it can take on both of us without any warning.

I am just as proud of my husband as any civilian wife is, maybe even more so. I understand the commitment, and need to serve, that pulled us both into the military life first hand. I know that no matter how much he loves me, he will turn around and walk proudly towards that plane that will carry him overseas to a war zone. He understands that I too, will do that same. I won’t complain about him being gone, or missing special days, because well, I signed on that dotted line too. Then I signed again when I decided to marry him.

It is a hard balance being dual military. We both are very career orientated. Sometimes we have to remember that as much as we love our jobs, as much as we want to be successful at them, none of that will matter if we don’t succeed in our marriage first. One of the highest divorce rates in the Air Force is Air Traffic Control; now make that two Air Traffic Controllers. We have a lot of odds stacked against us, but we both believe that true love, hard work, and dedication to each other can conquer anything.


Mrs.B said...

First of all, I thank you both for your service. I think it's totally awesome you're both in.
My brother and his wife are both Active duty Army Medics so I can sort of understand.

Natalia said...

Yay! Can't wait to read more about you two. My husband is active duty Infantry and I recently joined the Reserves as a Civil Affairs Specialist (which is nearly active duty with the way they work), I head to Basic in March.
Natalia @ Army of Two

Michelle A'etonu said...

OMG, I'm going to have to follow you. At one point in time, both my husband and I were active duty, but he got out and joined the reserves and I am still on active duty. we're stationed in germany now. so we definitely relate! and, my first unit in the army was an air traffic services battalion at fort bragg. i love it. so i know tons about air traffic controllers and aviation!

Netzna phan said...


You two are my dream!!! I want to be a Mrs. a Mom a Marine and an ATC! I am so happy to see there is hope. And that's you!!!